I am speaking as a single mother of a teen gamer, a gamer myself,TF2 community owner/manager, TF2 team sponsor and government social worker (my career) who works with and is responsible for 22+ high risk teens. Society as a whole will use things that they know nothing about as a scapegoat (in this case video games). Society as a whole also does not want to face the reality, take any responsibility or understand the problems that young people face today.
In my opinion, your mother (with all respects) was out of line and she is ignorant to the facts. Why? Well maybe because she, like so many other parents, don’t want to look at themselves as being part of the problem. Maybe she feels guilty herself as a mother and instead looking at her own fears in raising you she points to the video games you play instead (as you know you little buggers do not come with instruction manuals…lol <3). Maybe she is afraid that you are not socializing as much as she would like but is unable to communicate her fears properly. Why don’t you ask her where it came from? Call her on it. Tell her how much it bothered you that she would say such a thing. Open up the lines of communication. You have some responsibility to tell her how you felt about what she said. Educate her on the things you get from being online other then gaming. If you don’t, you are just as much as fault as she is for her ignorance. I am sure she loves you dearly, that she does her best everyday and she deserves respect. This does not mean she is perfect by any means. Sorry to be harsh, as I don’t know your mom, those were just my thoughts.
I apologize for the long post but this is an important issue for all online gamers who have parents who are ignorant to what being online is about. Talk to them, research stuff and educate them! My son grew up gaming and he is simply amazing (I bet all mom's say that..lol). My house is a constant flow of teens coming in and out hanging out gaming sometimes till 4 am on weekends. My grocery bill is insane but I know they are safe and in a good environment. I wouldn't change anything except for having a bigger house,a personal pizza delivery and better internet..LAWL. If more parents would understand and embrace video games and the online world (everything in moderation of course!)there would be no posts such as this. Good luck!
I am speaking as a single mother of a teen gamer, a gamer myself,TF2 community owner/manager, TF2 team sponsor and government social worker (my career) who works with and is responsible for 22+ high risk teens. Society as a whole will use things that they know nothing about as a scapegoat (in this case video games). Society as a whole also does not want to face the reality, take any responsibility or understand the problems that young people face today.
In my opinion, your mother (with all respects) was out of line and she is ignorant to the facts. Why? Well [b]maybe[/b] because she, like so many other parents, don’t want to look at themselves as being part of the problem. [b]Maybe[/b] she feels guilty herself as a mother and instead looking at her own fears in raising you she points to the video games you play instead (as you know you little buggers do not come with instruction manuals…lol <3). [b]Maybe[/b] she is afraid that you are not socializing as much as she would like but is unable to communicate her fears properly. Why don’t you ask her where it came from? Call her on it. Tell her how much it bothered you that she would say such a thing. Open up the lines of communication. You have some responsibility to tell her how you felt about what she said. Educate her on the things you get from being online other then gaming. If you don’t, you are just as much as fault as she is for her ignorance. I am sure [b]she loves you dearly[/b], that she does her best everyday and she [b]deserves respect[/b]. This does not mean she is perfect by any means. Sorry to be harsh, as I don’t know your mom, those were just my thoughts.
I apologize for the long post but this is an important issue for all online gamers who have parents who are ignorant to what being online is about. Talk to them, research stuff and educate them! My son grew up gaming and he is simply amazing (I bet all mom's say that..lol). My house is a constant flow of teens coming in and out hanging out gaming sometimes till 4 am on weekends. My grocery bill is insane but I know they are safe and in a good environment. I wouldn't change anything except for having a bigger house,a personal pizza delivery and better internet..LAWL. If more parents would understand and embrace video games and the online world (everything in moderation of course!)there would be no posts such as this. Good luck!
So I guess you're not getting any video games for christmas then.
So I guess you're not getting any video games for christmas then.
i have a good social life, i go outside, i snowboard, i play rugby, i have a 3.85 gpa, thats why it particularily angers me when my mom says stuff like this.
i have a good social life, i go outside, i snowboard, i play rugby, i have a 3.85 gpa, thats why it particularily angers me when my mom says stuff like this.
Maybe she just doesn't approve of it. That's not really something you can change, from my experience at least. You just need to have some patience and talk to her about it. Explain to her it's your hobby just like anything else. When I was growing up my parents (especially my mom) would bug me all the time about it. I even pulled out the "would you rather me be X, Y, Z" card like someone else mentioned in this thread. They eventually realized it was my hobby, I enjoyed it and accepted it. My assumption is most parents didn't grow up in an environment where they stayed home and just played video games as a hobby.
Maybe she just doesn't approve of it. That's not really something you can change, from my experience at least. You just need to have some patience and talk to her about it. Explain to her it's your hobby just like anything else. When I was growing up my parents (especially my mom) would bug me all the time about it. I even pulled out the "would you rather me be X, Y, Z" card like someone else mentioned in this thread. They eventually realized it was my hobby, I enjoyed it and accepted it. My assumption is most parents didn't grow up in an environment where they stayed home and just played video games as a hobby.
defiancepeople that use this argument are the kind of people that argue things that have zero facts behind them
people are stupid and sometimes you just can't do anything about that. its a really easy cop out for parents that don't wanna admit they are just shit and ignore obvious signs in their children that there is something wrong. video games don't make normal brains violent. just ends up that sometimes violent people end up playing video games.
your mom may give you shit for spending a lot of time on the computer. but one day you are going to make something of yourself and it will probably have something to do with that computer.
Uninformed parents who tend to rely solely on the local news for their information tend to say things like this that have no basis on fact when examined. I found that having a calm discussion with my parents about topics they are uninformed about tends to make them see my point of view and not be so critical of my time online.
[quote=defiance]people that use this argument are the kind of people that argue things that have zero facts behind them
people are stupid and sometimes you just can't do anything about that. its a really easy cop out for parents that don't wanna admit they are just shit and ignore obvious signs in their children that there is something wrong. video games don't make normal brains violent. just ends up that sometimes violent people end up playing video games.
your mom may give you shit for spending a lot of time on the computer. but one day you are going to make something of yourself and it will probably have something to do with that computer.[/quote]
Uninformed parents who tend to rely solely on the local news for their information tend to say things like this that have no basis on fact when examined. I found that having a calm discussion with my parents about topics they are uninformed about tends to make them see my point of view and not be so critical of my time online.
tragicMaybe she just doesn't approve of it. That's not really something you can change, from my experience at least. You just need to have some patience and talk to her about it. Explain to her it's your hobby just like anything else. When I was growing up my parents (especially my mom) would bug me all the time about it. I even pulled out the "would you rather me be X, Y, Z" card like someone else mentioned in this thread. They eventually realized it was my hobby, I enjoyed it and accepted it. My assumption is most parents didn't grow up in an environment where they stayed home and just played video games as a hobby.
ive used the would you rather me be X,Y, or Z card soooooo many times. to be honest i do spend alot of time on the computer so it doesnt really bother me too much that she gets mad after i spend alot of time on the computer what really bugged me is the 'joke' she made.
[quote=tragic]Maybe she just doesn't approve of it. That's not really something you can change, from my experience at least. You just need to have some patience and talk to her about it. Explain to her it's your hobby just like anything else. When I was growing up my parents (especially my mom) would bug me all the time about it. I even pulled out the "would you rather me be X, Y, Z" card like someone else mentioned in this thread. They eventually realized it was my hobby, I enjoyed it and accepted it. My assumption is most parents didn't grow up in an environment where they stayed home and just played video games as a hobby.[/quote]
ive used the would you rather me be X,Y, or Z card soooooo many times. to be honest i do spend alot of time on the computer so it doesnt really bother me too much that she gets mad after i spend alot of time on the computer what really bugged me is the 'joke' she made.
just realized that my mom is beyond any type of repair.
just gonna leave her alone until i move out when im 18.
just realized that my mom is beyond any type of repair.
just gonna leave her alone until i move out when im 18.
Up until I moved out earlier this year, my mom drank and abused xanax all the time - constantly got mad at me for being on the computer (among other things). People are gonna be irrational, there's nothing you can do about it.
It doesn't mean I love her any less, though. Try to remember that your mom just cares about you, but obviously find a way to move out asap. I know it can be extremely mentally and emotionally tasking to deal with someone who is abusive.
I tell a lot of people this but if you wanna get far away definitely consider studying abroad in a country that has no tuition fees (germany, norway, etc.) if you feel you're mature enough, since you would just have to find a way to get enough money to support yourself. I'm doing so and its a breath of fresh air to finally be able to live my own life - oddly enough I find myself going out way more when im not being suppressed by abusive parents and relatives :>
Up until I moved out earlier this year, my mom drank and abused xanax all the time - constantly got mad at me for being on the computer (among other things). People are gonna be irrational, there's nothing you can do about it.
It doesn't mean I love her any less, though. Try to remember that your mom just cares about you, but obviously find a way to move out asap. I know it can be extremely mentally and emotionally tasking to deal with someone who is abusive.
I tell a lot of people this but if you wanna get far away definitely consider studying abroad in a country that has no tuition fees (germany, norway, etc.) if you feel you're mature enough, since you would just have to find a way to get enough money to support yourself. I'm doing so and its a breath of fresh air to finally be able to live my own life - oddly enough I find myself going out way more when im not being suppressed by abusive parents and relatives :>