friends can help in a lot of situations for sure. i found that trying to distract myself by going out only made things worse when i got home. maybe i'm just weird but there's a lot of things i don't feel comfortable discussing with friends and i've had experience with them not understanding and eventually not speaking to me anymore. but i guess that's why i've seen a ton of doctors, therapists and psychiatrists and been on 5 different antidepressants since the new year.

drugs are bad, feelings are worse

not every problem is one your friends will understand or maybe even accept

relying on drugs to not be depressed is a very bad idea, you arnt dealing with your depressing you're just masking the feeling

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdNSkzT6UHE

Its a really solid video. Well worth the 24 minutes.

Watch it!

I hope it can help you out(and anyone else here)

Since the topic turned to utilizing chemicals - well I'll go there. Let ol' Marxist teach ya' some things - this is pry gonna be a bit long.

I went to college for free. I even had enough scholarship money left over that I could live where I wanted to and do whatever I wanted to so long as it accommodated my unique circumstances (I have an essentially motherless child).

I met awesome people and generally had a great time. Eventually, despite my determination that essentially every relationship I'd ever have with the opposite sex would be marred by the fact that no young woman in college would want to become a mother to a child that wasn't their own, I met one that was just weird enough to buy into the whole deal - and I suspect she even liked me a bit - which was a nice bonus.

We lived together for a year and some, essentially as a little surrogate family except instead of going to to work we went to class (and also a bit of work). I've never been happier in my entire life. The stress and guilt of my existence was gone - the fear of being a father was gone, and I spent everyday with somebody I adored.

Unfortunately, she couldn't get into graduate school anywhere but abroad. We had several lengthy discussion about what should be done about that fact. Ultimately it was mutually decided that she shouldn't put her life on hold on my account and that we'd try to work on a longer term solution. As time wore on a the date drew nearer, what had been an easy decision to make (months prior) was now one that, when it came right down too it, I couldn't believe I'd so readily acceded to or even suggested. I became intolerable to be around. I said things to her that nobody should ever have said to them - I hurt her worse than I've ever hurt anybody and we've not spoken since that night. Not a day goes by that I don't remember that year.

With essentially my entire life ripped out from under me, I went through graduation, and took a place holding job at a factory. I took to drinking heavily. I had drank a lot in college, especially when the kiddo's mom decided to start taking him every few weekends. But this was otherworldly. Then I got hurt at work, which brought all sorts of physical ailments on me - which still plague me daily. I decided to solve that with alcohol too, because the pain I was experiencing was dulled - and I could pretend to be a 20 something instead of being bound to a chair or bed most of the time.

I thought perhaps, everything would just carry on that way, I had an income from the injury, I appeared to be doing a decent job with the kiddo, but I was a wreck - everybody who knew me saw it as well. A few encouraged me to stop drinking so much or talk to somebody, but I shrugged it off.

I didn't realize anything was really wrong until I woke up in jail. Apparently, I'd wandered outside and was just meandering on the streets. I have no recollection of what was going on, or even that I had gone out. My memory of that night is that - well - I was just mixing some whiskey and 7 up and watching a movie. The next moment I'm in fucking jail. That's when I realized I'd basically just taken my whole life, marred as it was, and nearly ended/ruined it because I was so caught up in feeling sorry for myself that I refused to try and make anything better. Let me tell you, going to AA was basically the best thing ever - not necessarily because I bought into anything that was actually said there, but meeting people who were, in essence, the image of where I was going and what I would be in a few years time, completely alerted my self-perceptions.

I still feel really shit sometimes, and yeah, I still have a drink every now and again, but very rarely and with strict limitations. Is it a medical disorder that I experience? I don't know, I've been to a few psychiatrists and they tell me I'm relatively healthy lol. You can't rely on outside sources to make you happy - not chemicals, not other people, it has to be you yourself you decides to get your shit together and to develop healthy coping methods.

What defy is saying isn't totally off base - a change of circumstances, or just a simple trip to a place you've never been can make you feel *really* good sometimes. I would highly recommend it.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

whens the last time you did something for the first time?

change it up and do something else

Yes. Friends give times to forget about the bad things. Good friends provide a listening ear to vent so you don't go crazy. Even doing new things or meeting new people helps for a little while. For me at least, because this is online, I'm not going to deny the fact that I hide my sadness and depression every time I go out. Right now, I don't know if I'm depressed or just very sad. And I have been this way for so long that... well I've run out of friends to vent to because they simply got tired of it. And this is because of something deeply personal. And even after venting to certain friends, I still feel horrible when I get home. Going back to the dude who made this post, I honestly have no solution. I have been this way for 6 years and I've just gotten really good at hiding. That's my solution.

how old are you? what is it you do exactly? did you lose someone close to you recently

are you in school, do you work etc, seriously you need to be a realist with your current situation its honestly not hard to know what the void is in your life. a lot of people aren't content with what they're doing, you need to find something new, if you don't like your job, if you aren't happy with what school you're going to, if you need a lady friend in your life, if you don't like where you live travel a bit. or you could just be some angsty teenager that hasn't experienced much at all which could be depressing to begin with

everyone knows a lot of people that play tf2 are bro's and they can easily consider them friends but seriously staying at your computer is doing you more harm than you even know. essentially you're just moping around, you have to get out and do something different, you never know what you'll find that will spark your interest or be a pick me up

I know that you are by no means writing off his depression, and that you are just trying to be helpful. But we(both me and you) have no clue what his depression is about, if he's depressed simply because he hates how the world is, than going out and doing menial things will help no more than playing video games. Hell even friends aren't really that helpful.

I have a friend who was in Afghanistan for 2(i think it was two maybe it was three) tours and after his second one, for whatever reason he had come to hate how unfair the world is and how wasteful and shallow the majority America is. And he began to just kind of hate the world in general for how shitty it was. I mean how does a friend comfort that shit, nobody can suddenly make the world a better place. I haven't talked to him in a few weeks now(he's just traveling a lot and I think he is going to do another tour) but i'm sure he's still depressed and will probably remain so. And psychiatric help didn't really have an answer for how he could overcome it.

I think there's just some depressions that can't really be surpassed, and instead you just kind of live on with them, which sucks but it is what it is.

Smoking because of stress or depression is how you form a mental addiction.

Hell, I smoke a ton of weed, but I won't smoke it because I'm sad or upset, every time I get sad I'll want to smoke. I'm only saying this because it happened to one of my buddies when his parents split. That being said, do what works for you mang.

Although it's been offered, if you (or anyone else) wants to talk, add me.

Honestly, what I regard as the best way to deal with depression is to find something to motivate yourself. Work hard at a job, school, or anything else that requires some degree of responsibility from you. Last year school was especially rough for me, and my grandpa died when I was in one of the worst weeks, compounding my melancholy. However, by working hard in my classes and motivating myself with goals, I was able to pull myself out of the hole I had fallen into. By taking your mind off of the reason for your depression through working towards something, you can eventually build up your mental fortitude and be able to combat depression with responsibility. It doesn't necessarily have to be a job or schoolwork, but it definitely should be something you love, and are willing to spend lots of time in. Good luck!

talking to friends and family about these problems is more important, yes, but saying that posting about it here can't help is kind of asinine. while it may not be as effective, at least being able to talk about it to someone, which in this case is an online community in which he, i assume, holds dear to him in some way, is still extremely more helpful than not talking about it at all.

Add me if you wanna talk! Hang in there!

what ever you do dont try to kill yourself, drinking charcoal is the worst shit ever

i used to be extremely depressed to the point of suicide, afterwards i was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. even though the facility was shit some of the nurses were extremely helpful with moral support as well as just generally helping you make sense of all the shit that doesnt make sense. im on prozac, lithium and xanax now and things are going better and i dont think about killing myself frequently anymore. go see a therapist, they can be helpful but at first you'll probably think they're the most annoying people on the face of the planet (that feelingb usually goes away.) get help and dont bottle it up.

I agree to a certain extent that self-help is the only end to depression, but I took certain amphetamines when I was depressed and it definitely helped out a lot, especially in the earliest stages of treatment.

Of course, I'm talking about prescribed antidepressants, not alcohol. Also, if you're not happy with your shrink find a new one. Many of them are entirely incompetent, but sometimes that one person can salvage the wreck that is your life.

Just one thing I notice frequently: Please don't confuse sadness for clinical depression or the other way around. Sadness can make you really sad, depression consumes you and can generally not be overcome without professional help.

get a girl and depression gone

weed isn't some hardcore drug it helps with social anxiety and is a valid treatment for a considerate number of diseases

smoke some good weed and nothing is gonna happen to you, it isn't addictive it just relaxes you

He's not necessarily denying that. He's denying weed as a permanent solution.

but weed can be a permanent solution or until he starts feeling better, you don't need to smoke everyday just weekends or when you are feeling down

http://i.imgur.com/5PKz57y.png

http://ih1.redbubble.net/image.13195216.8885/fc,550x550,forest.jpg

IMO the hardest thing to do with depression is to convince yourself that the future is not as bleak as you think it is. If you can manage to stop listening to that little voice inside your head that calls you a piece of shit and tells you that the future is shit you can get through anything. You just have to accept that even though you aren't perfect, your a unique and wonderful person with plenty of positive characteristics.

all the stuff i just said i base off of personal experience so if it doesn't apply to you i'm sorry, but I just hate how much depression is downplayed in society when the pain of it is as real as the pain of breaking a bone
also f_blue knows what he's talking about, seek a medical professional if you can afford it

When you're clinically depressed you're always "feeling down" and being stoned all the time is not a good alternative.

this is straight up retarded

http://i.imgur.com/VC5BltW.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/0EugLgi.jpg

if u get a girl and smoke weed occasionally u cant be depressed unless ur ugly and bad @ life

smiley just go away you're not helping anyone