Alright lads, gonna be real with you here, I kinda forgot to do a prem writeup for the season but it seems like prem is a bit shit again this season and the ace team has mysteriously died (hmmmm).
For this reason i have decided to do a writeup that more acurately reflects my own level and hereby maybe knowledge of the players within the division. It also has 8 teams, unlike a certain division with certain players trying to make last minute teams.
This should go without saying at this point, but due to my expertise and familiarity with the topic at hand, my rankings can and will be correct. I am the authority.

1. SELECTED!
Keeping with the theme of cheaters, SELECTED! marks the return of the almighty azn, or broda, or night terror, or maybe even scorpion?
If azn isnt banned again by the end of the season (including playoffs) i will eat my own shoe.
Rest of the team seems decent idk man.

2. Boss Baby
I cannot be fucked to put in all the extra emojis and stuff. Seems like a decent team but the presence of not one but two grandpas in mould and war makes them appear weak and frail when it comes to doing anything other than reminice about the old days. War knows how to play the game and is on pocket and will probably end up maincalling so theyre gonna be good i guess. Hoping neither war nor mould suffer from any back injuries or memory loss.

3. KRITZBERG FOR DEFENCE!
I have legit never seen this team play and theyve been playing for a few seasons now. How washed is graba? Who knows man he wasnt that great when he wasnt washed so i cant imagine his performance to be very solid now either. Wonder joined a polish team 3 days before a game to beat me in an open official in s.23, won the game, left the team after he rolled us on two maps, then got his team a def loss for roster hijacking. We played the official knowing we could get the def win before ever playing the game and laughed our asses off when we got the def win. Get fucked idiot.

4. Ngolo’s kingdom
Decent roster with decent players i guess. Finally seems like wargasm has found himself a steppingstone to use his million mge elos for something other than playing ultiduo with vis. Wishing him luck with playing an actual gamemode.

5. L A N T U R T L E
Ancient mythical entities but digb is on the team and cuppers isnt there to not die to my airshots despite how hard i own him. These guys have been around forever and seem to be running the long con to hopefully one day be the div 2 herbsarmy/clanda. Permzilla also plays.

6. Joe and Lelia
Their real team name sucks dick so im naming them this instead. It is the joen and leila team. The first time i trialled for a joen and leila team in s22 or some shit they spent 20 mins discussing ikea furniture and where to put it. I was like 15 and mortified. Glad to report that they havent changed. They are and always will be the only and ultimate tf2 power couple.

7. The russians
I trialled for a mid team where i played against these guys and meaf ran into my rockets like 3 maps in a row and it was great. This means their teams bad right?

8. PAINT Gaming
Greek mythos speaks of the greek King Sisyphus, damned by Hades to spend the rest of eternity pushing a boulder up a hill only for the boulder to roll back down the hill once the arduous task is completed. This is is the plight of a man named BOBBYBASKETBALL and the team PAINT gaming.
Oh how the mighty have fallen. Comming into this they were looking like one of the strongest teams div 2 had ever seen. However, following a stern talking to about sandbagging from our very own head admin aoshi, PAINT Gaming took their first steps towards the seemingly innevitable disappointment and mediocrity this season will bring. Quite frankly, this team should be renamed to BOBBYBASKETBALL’s prison. If you have ever played a pug with more than one of this rosters players on the classes they appear to be playing this season, you will know how dire this is for our very own bobby. Charlie scout is the biggest troll this game has ever seen. Torrit on pocket doesnt really need description. The loss of their allstar roamer and saving grace catbowcar has left this already shrivelled and diseased husk of a team hemorrhaged and begging for death, a truly putrid corpse on the side of the road one might have found walking around medeival towns during the black plague. God help us all.

And there it is. The season has begun, excitement is in the air and lan is right around the corner.
And shockingly, the division to watch this season isnt prem or even div 1, but division 2. Will any of these teams go to lan? Dont think so. Who wins? Dunno watch dumms stream he’ll probably muster up the strength to watch these horrifying games. As our beloved game finally completely fades away from any sort of relevance and into a few dusty history books, so far back in the gaming history library that nobody will even remember it ever happened, as the innevitable heat death of the universe erases all trace of our tiny insignifacnt planet and the lives lived on it leaves it just as bland and forgettable as anything else the human race ever done.

See you on the battlefield.