To play devil's advocate, it's not valve's fault you have shitty internet; also this means you would have issues with the Direct Hit, Liberty Launcher, Huntsman arrows, medic arrows, flares, charged stickies, and rescue ranger bolts since all those weapons are faster than the loch-n-load so lnl is definitely not "broken" it might be a bit OP but the only thing broken is your internet. Further more the loch-n-load can be seen as helping balance out 6s since it significantly improves demos chances of dealing with scouts. (Personally I feel l-n-l is a tadd op especially in 9v9 and pub formats. since large clusterfucks tend to happen)

correct you don't hack, you cheat. if you hacked you would actually have a marketable skill

The term you're looking for is "Alpha state" basically you give up on alertness/concentration etc, and you feel relaxed cause you're just running and don't really have to worry about anything else.

The Crow

I'd almost guarantee this is a driver/gpu issue if it's still occuring on -default

try updating or rolling back your video driver.

that's an issue with transparent viewmodels if I recall, I can't remember exactly what the fix is atm.

I hate cheaters
I cheated in BF2 8 years ago...

if a AV is blocking certain ads and tf2center is forcing you to change your AV settings just to use their website I would highly recommend not doing so, there's a good reason to block at least some ads.

if you use m_rawinput 1

you can try using rinput
http://www.overclock.net/t/1538109/sourcegl-rinput-launcher-more-for-cs-go-tf2

you'll have to set tf2 back to m_rawinput 0 though, and you will have to open tf2 through that program.

-edit-
if you use m_rawinput 0 and don't use rinput, try m_rawinput 1 first.

Beat:
being single
not eating my leafy greens
inconsistent sleep schedule
not exercising

wip:
cutting out soda (for the 5th fucking time...)
breaking caffeine addiction / keep it in check
procrastinating my certifications...

[redacted]

take small steps.

1. Stop drinking soft drinks (soda/pop, most juices, lemonade, most pre-made teas, etc)
probably the biggest one for a lot of people is this. It's ridiculous how much sugar and calories you get from shitty drinks that do nothing for you. I try to stick to drinking just water, black coffee, or tea with no/little sugar added.

^that will also likely be the hardest habit to break. I don't know how many times I've had to kick that habit.

2. Have a salad with lunch and dinner, + try to avoid using a lot of dressings.
pretty easy to do if you like having salads, I love spinach and would suggest it for your salads.

3. Make your own meals from scratch. You'll cut out a lot of sodium, sugar, and fat doing this plus you'll likely enjoy this food more.
bit harder especially if you feel like you don't have enough time, I suggest making a 1 or 2 week meal plan and then repeating it. It'll make it a lot easier for you.

Try to do just 1 of those to begin with (for a month or 2) and then add 1 of the other ones and go forward from there. Also don't beat yourself up for not sticking to a healthier diet it doesn't help you to do so.

Playing HL instead of 6s or CSGO. At least I had fun though.

outside of TF2, probably not finishing my 2nd year of college, and had at least all my general education done for degrees.

I use the minimum models now, sure it still blocks some of the screen but I know it'll never be blocked or banned, and I can always tell what weapon I have out.

Marxist has a lot of good stuff too.
https://www.youtube.com/user/MediMarx