Alright, you win, the real question is; did you finish up? if you catch my drift.....

does it count as masturbation if you dont?

I once brought at song online for a thousand dollar

I don't know how it is for other schools, but in 6th grade, we got what was basically part 1 of sex ed. Imagine a dark room with a projector, a bunch of sweaty, nervous, and most likely embarrassed 12 year old's, and an old lady, somewhere around the ages of 50 to 60. The old lady was our teacher, and she had gotten to something about breast feeding. Me being the guy who tries to make a joke to feel less nervous, I raise my hand and ask her what boobs look like, and if she could show us. She flat out ignored me, and I shrunk down in my seat, all my friends looking at me like "you fucking dumbass."

public bus here too

In 9th grade I went to a party and got really fucking drunk after drinking rum and blue gatorade. it tasted like shit. Anyway, I got drunk really fast. I don't remember what happened exactly but this is what I heard happened. I tried to fight a huge hawaiian guy, shit my pants, threw up on my (hawt) friend and blacked out. I woke up in my bed wearing nothing but soggy, moist boxers. My friends told me that I tried to rape a girl so I called her up and apologized but she told me she had no idea what I was talking about.

good one guys!

After 2 months of dating a girl I find out that she genuinely thought she was a werewolf and drank HUMAN blood regularly with her friends. I can't make that up.
I don't know what's more stupid, me not noticing till the 2 month mark or staying for a 3rd.

In my defense she was hot. And wild.

Also a slut.

mustard do u think your tough, bullying round people on the intraweb?.. I would love to fist fight you in an alley way... I would love to break your nose.... i'm not to far either i'm 10 hrs away from new york. i'll meet you in buffalo (1.5 hrs from Toronto (Newmarket, ON to be exact) just buy me a beer after I sock you out. put it on youtube... ill mge you irl. Ikpure pencil this down as the next "stupid shit i've done" thnx...( please respond mustard I will meet halfway and film it.)let's have a good ol'e fashion fister, give tf.tv a good vid, lets put her on youtube.............. :):):):) i'll walts over to America and fight you on your soil. respond please.. #goleafsgo

http://thenewsportsguru.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/012313-NHL-Pittsburgh-Penguins-Deryk-Engelland-TV-Pi1_20130123222437700_660_320.png

colton orr your ass #goleafsgo

this thread is gold

http://i.imgur.com/eDUWWqR.png

I recently stuck my finger in a CPU fan.

no pankey

http://i.imgur.com/umXAIin.png

When I was like 10 I took the lightbulb out of a lamp in my room and put some of these batteries in the lamp and turned it on. It instantly fried the lamp, the outlet I plugged it into, and turned the electricity in our house off and back on.

I was so terrified I unplugged it and stuffed it in the back of my closet and didn't want to throw it away because I thought the garbage men would find it, see it didn't work, and come back to my house and ask my parents why its broken.

fell in love

Me playing middle school wrestling, and just torturing my fragile 12 year old to grueling workouts and just my summer completely taken away. It's something I just like to completely forget.

i got someone to drink my piss

caught one of my friends and some girl on a staircase fuckin and we just made eye contact and i disappeared

i shoulda joined in :(

talked to sideshow

bought overwatch

I said my team should have had a better ranking than #14. Scary shit man

i found my dad's razor blade when i was 8 and i didnt know what it was, like the retard i was i touched the blades and my finger got cut and started bleeding.
i ran to my mom and blamed the cat for the cut on my finger, then i cried and said sorry to the cat.

peed with a boner

-

this x1000

stuck my face in front of a dog while it was growling. Got a good portion of my cheek bitten off

subbed to b4nny

played with xersha

I've wasted good chances I've had in this life that other people won't even get

then realized i accidentally bought the origins edition.

gf convinced me to get a pug that had asthma